The Obscure Reference Channel's local forecast for Lisa's Buffyfic:

*muzak*

Unexpected cloudburst of Thomas Wolfe dialect in the early hours may give way to a steady rain of asides later in the day. Scattered Shakespeare showers will continue throughout the week. The Dante system has moved off, but the jet stream may bring another one along by the end of the forecast period. Mixture of Dante and Shakespeare precip may render the highways dangerous, so please keep advised before traveling. Later this evening, winds will be from the farcical with an occasional gust from Ronald Reagan, giving way later to Dunnettesque chess mists and a resultant increase in the sexual dew point. Tomorrow: a front of Spike is expected to collide with the Elisabethan air mass covering the area, resulting in mixed precip of references to Wordsworth, Patmore, and Tennyson. This will increase the Pained Giles Expression outlook for the rest of the evening, but the Spike front will move through relatively quickly, so this may cease to be a problem for traffic in the area.

This has been your local forecast, on the 8s every hour. Trust the Obscure Reference Channel for up-to-the-minute forecasts on references in your area.

*end muzak*