A Fic That I've Decided I'm Never Going to Write:

No, unfortunately, not the Lisa/Giles shipping fic. Especially not after wiping the drool off my keyboard from this.

The fic I'm not going to write is framed as a nightmare of Snape's. It's a treatment of Euripides's Bacchae: Snape is Pentheus, Voldemort is the risen Dionysus, the Death Eaters are the Bacchae, Dumbledore is Creon, and I think Harry should be Pentheus's mother, Agava or whatever her name is. Maybe. The jury that is my brain is out on that last one.

Why am I not going to write it? Well, just look at it. There it is. Snape has a nightmare. He's Pentheus, attempting to spy on the mysteries of the Death Eaters because he wants to put a stop to them. Voldemort has come back from the undead. He wants to foil Snape's plans, and he uses his gift of illusion and Harry Potter (perhaps: jury, remember?) to do it. Geddit? Okay. That was the shortest fic ever. Fic-a-minute, that's me. Only I wish I could think of an ending that didn't vindicate Voldemort. I always felt that Dionysus was the one with the hubris, not Pentheus. Pentheus was a misogynist ass, but Dionysus was a controlling evil mastermind demanding that all recognize his deitical (is that a word?) status. Puh-leeze.

So anyway.